I think I have been scammed

Real stories

Someone you met online who needs money

It starts as a friendship: a reply to a comment, a message, someone who writes every day. Months in, there is an investment, an emergency or a plan to meet, and it needs money. Under each story: where it could have been stopped, and how.

How these scams work

The same steps, every time

Each step is what the scammers do, then what stops them at that step. The numbers in each story match these steps.

  1. Stage01 A friendly message, out of nowhere. What stops it Not answering friend requests and messages from people you have not met. Read more
  2. Stage02 Months of attention, then a reason to need money. What stops it One person, agreed on beforehand, that you phone before any money moves, however close the friendship feels. Read more
  3. Stage03 A job abroad, a plan to meet: details that make it real. What stops it A video call or a meeting in person before anything else happens. Read more
  4. Stage04 Money by transfer, kept between the two of you. What stops it Treating a request for secrecy as the thing you tell somebody. Read more
  5. Stage05 Transfers to an address you have never paid before. What stops it Pausing when your bank asks about a payment to somebody new. Read more
  6. Stage06 Every payment leads to another emergency. What stops it Counting it up: what has been sent, and what has come back. Read more
  7. Stage07 Shame, and nobody told. What stops it Telling your bank, the police and the Anti-Fraud Centre, today. Read more
the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre where scams get reported nationally, which is not the same as being investigated

It gathers reports from across the country so that patterns can be seen. Your own case belongs to the local police force, and the Centre does not work it. It cannot move money either.

Kentville, Nova Scotia · April 2026

He knew about the bridge her husband helped build

Lost more than $130,000

Lynn, 74, left a comment on Facebook about the Confederation Bridge. Her late husband, an engineer, had helped build it. A man replied. He said he was an engineer too. He sent a friend request, and soon they were talking several times a week.

He said he worked for an oil company, and suggested she invest. Over several months she sent more than $130,000 by e-transfer, to what she thought was a legitimate email address. Her family confronted her at Christmas.

“I was shocked, really shocked, because I thought I was smarter than that.”

Lynn, 74

Her bank refunded about a third. Her church now pays her rent. A bank she used before had once questioned an e-transfer to a new address.

CBC News, 22 April 2026. “N.S. widow warns others after losing $130K in relationship scam”

Step by step, and what stops each one

  1. Stage 01

    A reply to her comment about the bridge, from a fellow engineer.

    What stops it here

    A stranger who replies to something personal you posted knows only what you posted. Kindness from someone you have never met is not a reason to accept a friend request.

    More about stage 01

  2. Stage 02

    Months of messages, several times a week.

    What stops it here

    Before any money moves, ring one person you settled on beforehand. With someone you have come to trust, that call matters most, because the trust is what the scam is made of.

    More about stage 02

  3. Stage 04

    An oil-company investment, by e-transfer.

    What stops it here

    An investment offered by someone you know only online is the request to show to someone else before you send anything.

    More about stage 04

  4. Stage 05

    E-transfers to an email address, over several months.

    What stops it here

    When your bank questions a transfer to someone new, the question is the help. Answer it fully, including who asked you to send it.

    More about stage 05

  5. Stage 07

    Her family found out at Christmas.

    What stops it here

    Today, call your bank’s fraud line, your local police and the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre. A date and an amount is enough to start. Anyone who then offers to win the money back is running a second scam.

    More about stage 07

Calgary · August 2025

She sold her father’s house to move in with a man she had never seen

Lost about $380,000

Shawna, 63, had been widowed for more than three decades when a man calling himself Gilbert first wrote to her, five years ago. He was warning her about another scammer on WhatsApp. They never met. He never sent a photo. He said he worked for the American government.

Three years in, she began sending him money. She sold the house her father left her and moved into a motel, expecting to move in with him.

“When he kept asking for more money and more money, I’m going, ‘What is this all for?’”

Shawna, 63

A photo he sent of their future house looked fake. She lost about $380,000, and now lives in a shelter in Calgary.

CBC News, 2 August 2025. “Romance scam costs Calgary woman over $300K in increasingly common form of fraud”

Step by step, and what stops each one

  1. Stage 01

    A stranger, warning her about another scammer.

    What stops it here

    A stranger who opens by warning you about scammers is using the warning to look trustworthy. A conversation that started that way is one to end.

    More about stage 01

  2. Stage 03

    A government job, and no photo, no call and no meeting in years.

    What stops it here

    Someone who never shows their face in years of talking is hiding it for a reason. Ask for a video call before anything else; a refusal is your answer.

    More about stage 03

  3. Stage 04

    A home together, if she paid for it first.

    What stops it here

    Before you sell a house or move money for someone you have not met, show the plan to one person outside it, and wait for their answer.

    More about stage 04

  4. Stage 06

    Requests that kept coming, for two years.

    What stops it here

    “What is this all for?” is the right question. Ask somebody else too: write down every payment and show the list to one person you trust.

    More about stage 06

Huron County, Ontario · July 2021

A surgeon abroad, then a hostage who needed a ransom

Lost about $700,000

In 2018, a woman in her seventies met a man through a social media messenger. He said he was a surgeon working for the United Nations.

Then came the reasons he needed money: surgeries, flights, emergencies, and once a story that he had been kidnapped by terrorists and needed a ransom. She lost about $700,000. Police learned of it through her daughter.

People caught in these scams “will continue to send money until there’s nothing left to give, even though they’ve been warned by family, banking officials and even police.”

Police in Huron County

CBC News, 15 July 2021. “Romance scam bilked Huron County senior out of $700K”

Step by step, and what stops each one

  1. Stage 02

    A surgeon, working abroad.

    What stops it here

    A job that keeps someone far away and unable to meet is part of the story, not bad luck. The rule still holds: one call to your named person before money moves.

    More about stage 02

  2. Stage 03

    A kidnapping, and a ransom.

    What stops it here

    A real kidnapping is a matter for police, never a private payment to a friend online. A request for ransom is the request to take to the police.

    More about stage 03

  3. Stage 06

    Surgeries, flights, emergencies: one after another.

    What stops it here

    If you are the family member: do not argue about the money already gone. Ask about this payment only: “You may well be right about all of it. I am only asking you not to send this one until Friday.”

    More about stage 06

  4. Stage 07

    Police learned of it through her daughter.

    What stops it here

    The person who finally tells is often family. If that is you, go to the bank and the police with her, and keep the talk on what happens next, not on how it happened.

    More about stage 07

Do this beforehand

In each of these, the person sending money had never met the person receiving it.

Before you send money to anyone you know only online, tell one person who has met you, and show them the request. If that feels like a betrayal of the friendship, that feeling is the scam working.

Agree a person to call firstHow to set the rule up, and why it works without anyone having to spot a scam.Why a scam never stops at one paymentAnd the rule that ends it, for you or for the family member watching.More real storiesOther kinds of scam, each told the same way.